it's coming to the end of the week and it's gonna be the dreaded block tests coming up soon. the principal has been drilling into us the fact that if we don't do well and end up in the bottom 20% of the school's percentile, there's an incredibly high possibility that we'll be forced to attend school EVERYDAY during JUNE HOLS and may even be forced to repeat J1 year. super nightmarish situation that no one wants. unfortunately, i think councillors are pretty screwed for while the rest of the JC2 cohort are having their tests, we have JC1 Orientation to conduct. so we're having our block tests one week later than everyone else. so not good. the next 2 weeks will probably be the hardest weeks for we'll have to study right after we get home from orientation (ard 8 plus everyday) PLUS be able to get in school the next day by 6am the next morning AND be super duper enthusiastic for the whole day just for the sake of making sure that the J1s have a great time. and then repeat the same thing over and over and over and over again. man. daunting. the things we do for the school. and the saddest part is? there's an outdoor gig on that friday night, the week before the council have their block tests, so i can't go!!! and i heard that the next one will only be organised after the a's. roar. $%%&*@

basket.

it's time to put Mental Skills Training to good use.

i like studying. i love studying. i love studying. i LOVE studying.

whoOhoo!

bahh.

anyway, away from my self-deluded state (as quan min likes to put it), something good happened yesterday.. my friend from Thailand sent me a letter!!! yayness.. ahahh (:

really horrible of me but i lost her address so i had no idea how to contact her except through msn. and then lo and behold, a letter!! and get this, she's the same age as me but she's ALREADY in University! i can't wait to go man. maybe i should go and study in Thailand. really miss the place. sigh.

oh oh. and the J1s are like EVERWHERE. it's like they're practically invading the whole place. i mean, i can hardly get any seats in the canteen anymore and i keep bumping into groups of J1s at the video room when i even have an inkling of watching a movie. (btw, watch Saving Private Ryan and Big Fish and Joy Luck Club!! incredibly touching movies. ok ok. so i cried. no surprise there. but at least it was only towards the end. but trust me, they were all really REALLY good.) maybe that's how our seniors felt when we were still the very suaku juniors.

aiyoh. RETRIBUTION. life is just so ironic sometimes. hahahh.

+++

so you know that
feeling? i guess
it's still there
or Not.

stretched between
so many islands
just can't find
my treasure.
do i even want it in the first place?

keeping things the way they are.
no surprises, no expectations
no pain.

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