you just might make me believe


what's your mode of transport?
mine is the sun.
when it rises dripping from
the sea when it falls like honey on
the trees when it swallows up
clouds my soul moves with it.

mine is you.
when you lift your eyes
when you look straight ahead
when you try to speak my
heart moves with you.



never wanna see you unhappy.
11:46:00 PM
Saturday, January 17, 2009
bop to the top
for a day that i thought would be like my other birthdays, no trouble no fuss affairs, ALL of you totally surprised the crap out me- fearless shuwen, gutsy faith, sweet syl, insanely random canz, the great 4e6 girls, my fabulous guides PLC, my awesome family and above & beyond amazing cousins. i never thought that people would care damnit. i feel totally undeserving but oh my GOD. all of it was better than some pretentiously posh hotel restaurant/yacht/party-at-a-club thing. i'm so glad happy fantastically giddy delighted thrilled elated insanely grateful IMMENSELY BEYOND A DOUBT THANKFUL that almost everyone i loved and cared about were willing to share it all with me. just beyond speechless. amazed. like how on earth did i get so damn lucky?

plus, deceiving me like that. tsk. tsk.
sometimes i'm glad i'm so gullible. :D

shuwen: "i need to go to the toilet" & then coming out with a lighted cake & who probably bribed the waiter to give the girl hand-made flowers. and then "come, let's go to clarke quay" before ambushing the girl with the brilliant bungee thing. you girls were brave to do the scary thing with me. THANK YOU SO MUCH. and shuwen thank you for being so patient at the hairdressers. see. you have good taste though i still tie my hair back (i'll let it go once everything grows out! guides'/scouts' honour)

eunice (in all innocence): "so got anything planned tmr ah?". edwina saying "it's time!" & dilpreet "get ready 4e6 people! take photo take photo!" and then bringing out the cake from nowhere. i honestly didn't realize it was for me, i thought it was someone else's celebration i swear which was why i sang along the bday song at first. okay blur there.

my dad: "come with me, i need to buy stuff" and then almost giving me sore feet walking the four stories of mustaffa centre while he decided, stalling for time. slooowly eating chapati & indian kway teow at little india. driving to the old flea market. driving the long long way home. "eh how to spell 'landed' ah?" while texting "The Eagle has Landed".

matin & hariz: "your birthday's on monday right? first day of school hahha" & "eh your bday on sun or mon ah?" "black, white, gold- coming soon" (which i thought was for a school proj) "let's go for overnight cycling" (which i was looking forward to!) while they slogged with the secret preparations and plannings and sneakily taking away my old pictures & thumbdrive for a month. my sister & parents all in on it like some covert NS operation.
i'm just proud of both of you guys & the rest of the cousins for pulling everything off so well. and for bringing almost everyone together. now THAT was a surprise. i never thought the extended family & my PLC girls would all be there for something like this. and the video & the music & the games & the pretty cupcake-cake & the deco & the balloons & the masks & the IPOD & my ma's awesomely talented cooking & the sleepover afterwards watching gossipy TV3 & listening to my awful singing. i knew you were all extremely tired. THANK YOU THANK YOU times 2731728699279882426482 gazzilion for the amazingness & more.



(and sheila, that was such a touching letter la. i almost cried.
i'm so glad & proud to call you my sister even though you irritate the hell out of me sometimes.
thank you so so much you toothead. you actually made me happy. (: )







MUCH LOVE. i really don't deserve so much. I AM AWED. FLOORED. really.
THE BEST PEOPLE A GIRL CAN POSSIBLY HAVE.
how can i possibly ask for anything more?


ah crap. i think i might cry.

honesty is the best policy